Navigating Grief Through Journaling with Jessica Boarman

Angie Robertson: 00:00:00

I'm Angie Robertson and you're listening to the Spirit led Life podcast.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:05

Episode 40 October marks National Journal Writing Month.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:12

If you've been listening to the Spirit led Life podcast for a minute, you know I am passionate about journaling, which is what I use to communicate with God.

Jessica Borman: 00:00:21

Today is the second episode in a.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:24

Series on journaling where I will be highlighting the diverse methods and styles of.

Jessica Borman: 00:00:29

Journaling, emphasizing its flexibility.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:32

Joining me on today's episode is my friend Jessica Borman.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:37

Jessica and I have a chat about our passion for journaling and we learn about her story of how journaling was a pivotal outlet for her grief.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:45

I know this episode will speak to someone who might even be able to relate to Jessica's story.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:50

Let's go to the show.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:53

Welcome to the show.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:54

If you're new here, I am glad.

Jessica Borman: 00:00:56

You are joining us.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:58

On this podcast.

Angie Robertson: 00:00:59

We explore who God is so we can know who he has made us to be and learn to live our lives by the Holy Spirit.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:07

Before we get into today's topic, I want to invite you to join our mailing list.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:12

You will receive weekly emails that let you know when a new episode releases, as well as I share behind the scenes in those emails that I don't share anywhere else.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:22

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Angie Robertson: 00:01:29

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Angie Robertson: 00:01:36

I'd love to communicate with you each week and you can always reply to those emails as I receive the responses directly.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:43

Today is a fun chat I had with my new friend from Instagram, Jessica Borman.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:49

I found Jessica's account through another person's account who tagged her and I started following her.

Angie Robertson: 00:01:55

She was posting content which really spoke to me and I started commenting on her post or liking them or sharing them.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:03

I then decided to take it kind of off social media and subscribe to her newsletter.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:09

And she sends out amazing newsletters and I replied to her newsletters even today with some thoughts or feedback or the way that it inspired me or encouraged me.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:20

And I just like to share that with her.

Jessica Borman: 00:02:22

Like I love to encourage people.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:24

So out of that, our friendship was born.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:27

And when I discovered she was passionate about journaling and even created journal prompt cards, I knew our connection was God divine.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:37

When I was planning on upcoming episodes with the Holy Spirit, I knew this month, October, was going to be all about journaling and Jessica was one of the first people I wanted to have on the show.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:49

She is a resilience companion, a grief navigator, and an advocate for intentional living.

Angie Robertson: 00:02:55

She helps women build resilience, embrace vulnerability, and live purposefully by offering guidance through her podcast writing and her JB journal Decks.

Angie Robertson: 00:03:07

Rooted in faith, she encourages personal growth, emotional connection, and generational mindset shifts on health and well being.

Angie Robertson: 00:03:16

She uses her own experiences with grief and perfectionism to connect with others and inspire healing.

Angie Robertson: 00:03:22

I can't wait for you to meet my friend, Jessica.

Angie Robertson: 00:03:26

Welcome, Jessica, to spirit led life.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:29

I am thrilled that you are here.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:32

Thanks.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:33

It's been an amazing connection.

Angie Robertson: 00:03:35

I shared at the intro how we.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:36

Connected on instagram, and now we're kind of like, in real life here.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:41

Well, we're not in the same place, but we're at least connecting via the Internet, so that's fantastic.

Jessica Borman: 00:03:47

And I also shared that, I don't know if you've ever been to a, like, with a friend somewhere, and you asked, like, you've maybe taken those quizzes where they say, ask somebody that, you know, what they think about you, or, like, what do they see in you that you don't see in yourself?

Jessica Borman: 00:04:04

And one time, one of my friends, I asked her that, and she said, well, you're a.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:09

You are so passionate about journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:11

I've never met somebody as passionate about journaling as you are.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:15

And I say that now.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:17

I have met somebody that is as passionate, if not more passionate than me, about journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:23

And I knew that this month, with it being National Journal writing month, I wanted to have you on to talk.

Angie Robertson: 00:04:29

About that, and we could just share.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:30

And this is also the first time Jessica and I are having a conversation together, like, you know, physically, instead of just on, like, instant messenger on social media.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:41

So, yeah, very exciting.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:44

So let's just kind of dive in and let's first start talk.

Jessica Borman: 00:04:47

Let you tell the people about a little bit about yourself, what you're doing.

: 00:04:52

That's always a big, big question with me.

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I'm always like, okay, where do I start?

: 00:04:57

So I have been married for 25 years.

: 00:05:01

I think we shared that together.

Jessica Borman: 00:05:03

Yes, we do.

: 00:05:04

So 25 years to Bruce.

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And he's been my rock through so much.

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And we have a daughter.

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She is 20.

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She's about to be 23.

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So, um.

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But anyway, so I don't know.

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I like to call myself, um, a resilience companion.

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Just somebody that's a grief navigator.

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You know, I advocate for intentional living.

: 00:05:31

Um, you know, I just love helping people navigate ups and downs in life, um, just because I've.

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I've lived it, you know, just through my writing, through my podcast, through anything that I do, it's always about trying to help someone else through whatever they've.

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Whatever they're going through.

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And obviously, everything's rooted in faith with me, just because that was.

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That was where I turned whenever I lost my brother and I lost both my parents.

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So I want to help people.

Angie Robertson: 00:06:05

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:06

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:06

And, I mean, it's a.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:08

Unfortunately, it's so needed in these days.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:12

I mean, ever since the pandemic, it has been.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:16

It just seems one thing after the other.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:18

It's just so much of a burden that we carry, not just in our own lives, but in the world around us.

: 00:06:25

I agree.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:26

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:06:27

And having somebody like you to help navigate that is so incredibly important.

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I just think grief is such a big animal.

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I mean, it's, you know, people always immediately go to death, and that's.

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That's true.

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But, you know, you can grieve what your life used to be before an illness.

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You can grieve a loss of a job or a dream or, you know, you can just grieve the loss of a friendship or a relationship.

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So there's just.

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Grief is much more than just, than just death.

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We just got to be there for each other and walk each other through this life.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:02

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:03

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:04

And that's, you know, the Bible says that.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:05

That we're meant to be in relationship and that we're meant to walk together through this, so.

: 00:07:11

Yeah, I love that.

Angie Robertson: 00:07:13

So let's talk a little bit about.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:15

We'll dive in since we want to hit all things journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:19

Talk a little bit about how you started journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:22

Like, what.

Angie Robertson: 00:07:23

What was.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:23

Where did you start with that?

Jessica Borman: 00:07:25

Like, for me, I started when I was young, but I.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:27

It's evolved, and we'll get into that, for sure.

: 00:07:30

Same, same.

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e, you know, it's back in the: 1980

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I mean, do you.

Jessica Borman: 00:07:39

The water bed.

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I mean, I would sink into my water bed, and, you know, that was really before fancy journals and pens and all that stuff.

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So, I mean, I literally started journaling in a composition notebook, the black and white speckled notebook.

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And I just remember I had the.

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I think everybody, for some reason, everybody had this pin at school.

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The.

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The cheap bic pen, the blue top.

Jessica Borman: 00:08:04

Yep.

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So I just remember those were.

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That was where I started.

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So I just.

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I would sit on my bed and I would just write in there.

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Just anything that was going on with my day or anything that I was going through, I just noticed that it really did help me, um, process things that I was going through.

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And then I started writing poetry in there, and, you know, just all those kind of things.

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Doodling.

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I know we were talking about doodling a little bit before we.

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We started recording.

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I don't know.

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I just remember starting whenever I was very young, I always liked to record events.

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Like, I always had a wall calendar, and I would write, you know, just events if I went to.

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Went on a date or if I went to dinner with friends or if I went to watch Jerry Maguire or had seven teeth filled or, you know, just.

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I would just have all these random things on my.

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On my calendar.

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And so I just have always just enjoyed.

Jessica Borman: 00:09:03

What kind of.

Jessica Borman: 00:09:04

Was there anything significant that drew drove you to journaling?

: 00:09:09

You know, I've thought about that so many times, and I just cannot pinpoint anything in particular.

: 00:09:15

You know, I've always enjoyed writing, and I was always drawn to writing in, you know, English and classes whenever I was, you know, younger.

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And so I don't know if it was just the act of actually writing and putting words together, if that's what drew me to journaling.

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But, yeah, I just always loved, loved writing.

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And another thing that I always really enjoyed doing was vision boarding, too.

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So sometimes I kind of.

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Sometimes I kind of wrap that in with journaling just a little bit, just because I feel like it's.

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It's maybe not physically writing, but, you know, you're cutting things out and you're pasting it on the page.

: 00:09:51

Yeah.

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And you're kind of labeling it, you know, and giving it meaning.

Jessica Borman: 00:09:55

So is your journaling involved over time, like, you know, from when you were journaling when you were younger to now?

Jessica Borman: 00:10:04

How has that kind of evolved for you?

: 00:10:07

Yes, it definitely has.

: 00:10:09

I mean, you know, over the years, I've picked it up and I've sat it back down, but it's just always been one thing that I've always turned to whenever I'm in my darkest places.

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And I do find myself sometimes journaling whenever I'm in good places as well.

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But I've noticed that I tend to turn to it a little bit more whenever I'm going through a hard time.

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I just remember after I lost my brother, he was 17, and it was just a sudden loss, and we were all surprised and shocked, and so it was just a really difficult time for our family.

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And so I just remember, I just didn't know what to do with these emotions I had.

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I mean, I just.

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They were so big, and I was like, I have to do something.

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I have to get these.

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These out some way.

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And so I just remember picking my journal up and just writing.

: 00:11:02

And, you know, I started writing some poetry, and, you know, that was just very healing for me.

: 00:11:07

So I just noticed that at that time, that's whenever I really recognized the power of journaling.

: 00:11:15

You know, beforehand, I'd always done it, but I didn't really realize what it was doing for me.

Jessica Borman: 00:11:22

Totally understand what you're saying there.

Jessica Borman: 00:11:23

Like, it.

Jessica Borman: 00:11:24

I don't know about you, but, like, since you've been journaling since you're young, you talk about writing some of the hard things and some of the good things, but then I don't know if you like me.

Jessica Borman: 00:11:34

I go back and I look at those things, and I can see, like, what changed?

Jessica Borman: 00:11:40

What's changed from that time to now and, like, where God's hand was and things.

: 00:11:44

Yes.

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Yes.

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I had actually kept a journal whenever we were during COVID So it was about a month after.

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After the shutdown, I think, you know, it was just.

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Emotions were everywhere.

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So I remember just picking up a journal and saying, okay, I'm gonna write in this every morning.

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Just document what is going on and how I'm feeling.

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And I always like to use this as an example of how your emotions and your feelings and your mood changes from day to day.

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Because I literally remember.

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I think it was about.

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I think that was, like, April 16.

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So it was about a month after the shutdown, and I just was pouring my heart out on the page and just actually, I was writing them in the form of a prayer to God.

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I was just saying, dear God, and just writing out whatever was on my heart, and I was just desperately pleading.

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I was just.

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I was scared.

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I was upset.

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I was feeling defeated.

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I was trying to manage work and home life, and it was just.

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You know, I think everybody was really going through a hard time.

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Like.

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But I just.

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That.

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That day, specifically, I just remember being so distraught and so down and so negative and feeling so bad.

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Like I just could not keep up and, like, I was drowning.

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And then the very next day, because, I mean, obviously, I didn't go back to read it till later.

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April 17.

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It was like, thank you, God, for this wonderful day.

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And, you know, the sun shining, the birds chirping, and, you know, all the things.

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So it's like, you know, it just really.

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Your emotions change so rapidly and so quickly from day to day.

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And so I don't know, maybe that maybe journaling that day got me through that day, you know, that hard day.

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That I was going through.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:32

Yeah, I find that, too.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:34

I, like, I'll, I'll write some things out and some of it'll be pretty gruff.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:40

And then I'll go back and read it the next, like, then I'll journal the next day, and maybe a week later I'll go back and read, and I'm like, whoa.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:47

And then look.

Angie Robertson: 00:13:47

Wow.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:51

It was totally different there.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:52

I get it.

Jessica Borman: 00:13:53

But I think it's one, I find that journaling kind of, it's a place for me to release those emotions instead of bottling them up and keeping them inside.

Jessica Borman: 00:14:02

It allows me to get them out and process them.

Jessica Borman: 00:14:05

Otherwise, they just stay stagnant in my body, which isn't good.

Jessica Borman: 00:14:09

So I think for me, that's, that's what it does, you know?

Jessica Borman: 00:14:13

I don't know if you've had this same experience as well.

: 00:14:15

Yes, it, you know, I, I live in a small town, and I feel like a lot of people, they know my story.

: 00:14:23

They know that I've gone through a lot of pretty big losses.

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And so when people go through hard times, a lot of times they'd message me and they'd say, you know, I'm struggling with, you know, my parent, you know, my mom passing away or my dad passing away, whatever.

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And how did you get through it?

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And I'm always, I would always just say, have you ever tried journaling?

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And it's just a lot of times there's like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

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No, that's not for me.

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I think people get really intimidated by it because I don't know if it has some kind of a, if people just think it's bigger than it is.

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But, I mean, such a simple practice.

Angie Robertson: 00:15:01

Yeah.

: 00:15:02

You don't, there's no grammar, there's no punctuation, there's no spelling.

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There's just, you're just pouring it all out on the paper.

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So it's just for you.

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That's all.

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That's the only person it's for.

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It's not for anybody else to read.

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It's you just pouring it all out in the page.

Angie Robertson: 00:15:17

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:17

And, I mean, I always tell people there's no right or wrong way to journal.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:20

Nobody's going to grade you on what you're journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:22

It's like, it's, it's meant for you.

Angie Robertson: 00:15:24

It's meant for you to be able.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:25

To process and to be able to have a place, a safe place to go and express yourself.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:32

Whether it's anger or sadness or happy or joy or whatever, it can contain it all.

: 00:15:39

Yes.

: 00:15:40

Yeah, I agree.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:41

Of course, a lot of times, my journaling now is I'm writing to God.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:48

So sometimes he's having a conversation with me.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:51

He's included in there.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:52

But other than that, that's the only person that gets into the journal.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:56

Let's talk a little bit more about that.

Angie Robertson: 00:15:57

Like.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:58

So I write.

Jessica Borman: 00:15:59

Yeah, I use my journal.

Jessica Borman: 00:16:00

I do a lot of communicating with God.

Jessica Borman: 00:16:03

Like, I'll do an actual dialogue with him in my journal.

Jessica Borman: 00:16:07

Does journaling help you connect deeper with God?

: 00:16:12

Yes.

: 00:16:12

Yeah, I think so.

: 00:16:14

You know, whenever I'm really good mentally, I'm waking up in the morning, and I'm reading Jesus calling.

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I'm reading that, I'm highlighting, I'm circling.

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I'm just taking it all in.

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And I am using one of my journal prompt cards, and I'm writing whatever that question has asked me.

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I'm writing it, and I'm reflecting on what I just read from Jesus calling.

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And, you know, then I might pick out a piece of scripture, and then I'm, you know, kind of reflecting on that and writing what that means to me, um, and how I want to take that into the day.

: 00:16:52

So.

: 00:16:52

So, yes.

: 00:16:53

Um, whenever I'm really deep into a good morning routine, I feel like journaling is a really great part of my prayer life.

Jessica Borman: 00:17:02

Well, you kind of mentioned it, so.

Angie Robertson: 00:17:04

Let'S talk about it a little bit.

Jessica Borman: 00:17:06

You have the journal prompt cards, um, which I've shared with the audience that, um, you know, I did a little instagram reel showing me using the cards, and I love them, and I think they're awesome.

Jessica Borman: 00:17:20

Talk a little bit more about those.

Angie Robertson: 00:17:21

What.

Jessica Borman: 00:17:22

What led you to create those cards?

: 00:17:26

Well, just like I'd mentioned, whenever people would reach out and they would ask me for ideas of how I got through my loss, and people were just so intimidated by journaling, and I just.

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I was asked to.

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To lead a journaling workshop for a group, and I thought.

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I just wrapped my brain.

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I thought, I want to find a tool.

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I want to find something for them to take away and to be able to use that to take away some of the intimidation and some of the, you know, just.

: 00:18:01

Yeah, just the intimidation.

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And I originally started with a.

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Like, a journal that had prompts within the journal, you know, so.

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And then I just started thinking, well, that that was kind of complicated to have it printed and all that.

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So I was.

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Although the cards ended up being more complicated than I thought, but once I got that idea in my head, I was like, I want to do the cards, but I just thought, the cards were a really good thing because people like to have their own journals.

: 00:18:30

They like to have, you know, they want to pick out what their own journal they might want lined, they may want unlined, they may want dotted.

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Um, you know, so that just gives them the freedom to be able to use that.

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And they can pass those cards on too, um, whenever they get through the deck.

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And if they decide they want to pass it along to a friend, they can do that.

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And there's, they're not sharing in any private, you know, anything private, um, that they written in the journal.

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But.

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So I just decided I was going to find a way to make these prompt cards.

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And, um, the ladies that I was speaking with, they were part of more of a growth minded group.

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So I just decided to create the growth deck and just try to find quotes and prompts.

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Quotes.

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And then I wrote prompts that correlated with the quotes.

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But all of them that were growth minded, some that were challenging their, their thoughts, some of their limiting beliefs, and just kind of helped them think forward and think more towards their goals.

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And so then I started with the growth deck, and after I got the growth deck to all those ladies to take away with the, from the journaling workshop, I decided to do a pre order, and I think I sold, like, I don't know, maybe 75 decks pre order.

: 00:20:01

Yeah.

: 00:20:01

So I was like, okay, well, maybe there's something here.

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And then it just kind of evolved.

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Do you have the bloom deck?

Jessica Borman: 00:20:11

I do, yes.

: 00:20:12

Okay.

: 00:20:13

Yes.

: 00:20:13

So the bloom deck was the second deck, which.

: 00:20:15

That one in circulation anymore, or I'm not, I'm not selling that one anymore.

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But I had a friend who, close friend who was doing a subscription box, and she was trying to, she really loves to find a very specific things that are growth minded.

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It was a bloom box, and she likes to support women owned businesses.

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And so she was going to put the growth deck in there.

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And I said, well, how about I create, like, a specific customized deck for the bloom box and call it the bloom deck and include scripture and quotes?

: 00:20:56

Um, just because I, I felt like a lot of the women that were at the conference that I had spoken at for the journaling workshop, I figured that a lot of those ladies would probably get the bloom box.

: 00:21:07

And I thought, well, they've already got the growth deck, so let's, let's get a new deck.

: 00:21:11

So, um, I created the bloom deck, and that one was a pretty big hit, too.

: 00:21:17

So then people started saying, well, can you make one for teenagers?

: 00:21:20

Can you make one for kids?

: 00:21:21

Can you make one for couples.

: 00:21:22

And, you know, um, so I kind of had to hone it in a little bit just because of the cost of printing each deck.

Angie Robertson: 00:21:29

Sure.

: 00:21:30

And so then I said, since then, I've made the confidence deck, and then my word of the year this year is joy.

: 00:21:40

So I created the joy deck this year.

: 00:21:42

So, anyway, I mean, you can kind of tell what the themes are of the.

: 00:21:47

Of the prompts are based off the name.

Jessica Borman: 00:21:49

Yeah.

: 00:21:49

But so now.

: 00:21:50

So now I have the growth deck, the confidence deck, and the joy deck that are available, but, yeah, yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:21:57

And I'll be sure to link to them in the show notes for everyone listening.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:00

So you can get a copy of your own for whichever deck or all of them.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:03

Yeah, that'd be great.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:05

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:06

ally, many years ago, back in: 2016

Jessica Borman: 00:22:20

It was like you said everybody wanted.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:22

So I did lined, and I did unlined, but then they wanted a calendar, then they wanted this, and then they wanted prompts, and it was just, like, so overwhelming that I was.

Angie Robertson: 00:22:32

I was done.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:33

I was like, you know what?

Angie Robertson: 00:22:34

And then.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:34

And then I started digital journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:36

So I felt like a fraud.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:37

Like, not writing in my.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:39

Not even using my own journal that I was creating.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:41

I was, like, writing it.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:42

So I said, you know what?

Jessica Borman: 00:22:43

Let's just be done with this business.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:45

But, yeah, it can get really, like, is there's just so many different options and things to choose from, so, yeah, I love that.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:54

What has journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:22:57

You've experienced a lot of grief in your life.

Jessica Borman: 00:23:00

What has journaling done for you in terms of your grief?

: 00:23:04

You know, I think that it has forced me to look it square in the eye and I.

: 00:23:15

To really put my head down and walk through the storm.

: 00:23:23

I mean, grief is just.

: 00:23:25

It's all encompassing.

: 00:23:26

I mean, it's just.

: 00:23:27

It can overtake every aspect of your life.

: 00:23:31

And I feel like sometimes we have so many thoughts and ideas and emotions that are just swirling through mind and our entire body when we're grieving.

: 00:23:44

And whenever you can put your pen to the page and you can just let whatever is in your head flow out in that paper, it.

: 00:23:55

There is a release there.

: 00:23:57

You know, there's an emotional release.

: 00:24:00

And like you said, like we talked about journaling, with adding the faith aspect to the journaling.

: 00:24:11

If you can write letters to God, I mean, you know, tell him what's on your heart.

: 00:24:17

So I just.

: 00:24:18

I feel like it just really.

: 00:24:21

It really had.

: 00:24:22

It really forced me to walk through my grief because I think I'm a natural, I'm naturally a person to, to repress a lot of things.

: 00:24:35

And those some ten that whenever you, whenever you repress things, it just comes out in negative ways.

: 00:24:41

So I feel like it really helped me, just helped me get some of those things out.

Jessica Borman: 00:24:47

How can someone know that they're repressing their emotions?

Jessica Borman: 00:24:52

And what can they do to kind of start to acknowledge them?

: 00:24:58

You know, there's so many, so many ways that you can realize that you're repressing your emotions.

: 00:25:05

One in particular way that I knew that I was repressing my emotions was I had built up a wall, and for many years, I didn't allow myself to cry.

: 00:25:18

I know that sounds really strange, but I'm a little headstrong.

: 00:25:23

Sometimes when I put my mind to something, I'm just, I'm going to do it, so.

: 00:25:27

But I just, I would not allow myself to cry.

: 00:25:30

And I didn't really even notice that I was doing that consciously until something tragic would happen around me.

: 00:25:41

And it was almost like I just.

: 00:25:45

It was just like, bounce off me.

: 00:25:48

It was like.

: 00:25:49

And I'm like, that is not who.

: 00:25:51

That's not who I am.

: 00:25:52

That's not who I have been.

: 00:25:55

You know, I was always the one that was very emotional.

: 00:25:58

You know, if, if, you know, if I heard of somebody that had passed away and, you know, had lost a brother or, you know, something that would affect me and I would, I would cry about that, you know, even if I didn't know them that well, I could just feel their pain.

: 00:26:16

And I noticed for many years, especially after my brother passed away, that I just wouldn't allow myself to cry.

: 00:26:26

It was like, I just was like, I'm not feeling this.

: 00:26:28

I'm not.

: 00:26:29

I'm just.

: 00:26:30

It's, it's, you know, I built this armor around me, so I think that's, that's one is not allowing yourself to cry.

: 00:26:41

You know, I think anger, you know, if you find yourself really irritable and angry, especially on things that maybe normally wouldn't upset you or I, you know, you might just want to, like, pause and be like, okay, there's a root cause here.

: 00:26:57

There's something that's something that's bothering me.

: 00:27:01

There's a deep.

: 00:27:01

There's a deeper feeling, a deeper meaning here.

: 00:27:04

You know, I think weight gain, for me, that was a big thing.

: 00:27:10

You know, I noticed.

: 00:27:11

I mean, of course, I'm getting a little older.

: 00:27:13

I'm kind of.

: 00:27:13

I'm in my forties now, but.

: 00:27:16

So I know that's just part of it, but, um, over the last ten years, I've noticed that I've just had some.

: 00:27:23

Some weight creeping up on me.

: 00:27:25

You know, um, I think I'm probably 45 pounds heavier than I was when my parents passed away.

: 00:27:32

Um, and I.

: 00:27:34

I can't recall that.

: 00:27:35

I don't really think there's a lot of different lifestyle changes that I've, that would, that would attribute to that.

: 00:27:40

And so I think that has a lot to do with stuffing my feelings down.

: 00:27:45

Those are.

: 00:27:46

Those are three that, that just came straight to my mind.

Jessica Borman: 00:27:48

You talked about journaling as a way to release kind of your emotions and start to tap into your emotions.

Jessica Borman: 00:27:54

Are there any other ways that you've worked with people to help start to move those emotions around?

: 00:28:02

You know, I just try my best to share honestly, a lot of what I do is I share on social media, and through my Monday message, I send out that email every Monday.

: 00:28:17

But I just try to share information with them on different topics and emotions.

: 00:28:23

A lot of it's tied back to emotions.

: 00:28:26

Emotions about perfectionism, you know, just wanting to hold on, to control and grief.

: 00:28:35

And so I feel like the way that I work with people, I think if you, I guess if you want to call it work with people, it's really just trying to share information with them about ways they can express their emotions and overcome perfectionism and to find, you know, find their worth beyond what they do, you know, I want people to know that they are more than their job or more than they do.

: 00:29:06

I guess I really just try to share inspirational information and stuff that they can take away that will help them.

Jessica Borman: 00:29:14

And bringing into light, it sounds like bringing to light, helping them to recognize things like the perfectionism and control and things like that.

Jessica Borman: 00:29:23

It helps people to recognize, oh, that's something I am doing and.

Jessica Borman: 00:29:28

Okay, and you provide excellent tips of ways to work through that.

: 00:29:33

Yeah.

: 00:29:34

Another thing that I really am passionate about is, um, supporting fellow introverts.

: 00:29:40

For the longest time, I really, um.

: 00:29:43

I guess I would.

: 00:29:43

I guess I felt bad about being an introvert.

: 00:29:46

I felt like it meant that I was wrong or there was something wrong with me or that I was weird or, um.

: 00:29:51

But I'm just like, no.

: 00:29:53

You know, as I've gone through my life, I'm like, no, I am who I am, and.

: 00:29:56

And I really bring some unique qualities to the world just because I am reflective and I, you know, I have a high intuition because I am more reflective and introvert, you know, introverted so I just always like to show extra love for my fellow introverts, too.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:15

Yeah, for sure.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:17

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:17

I was talking to somebody else today that they're introverted as well.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:21

And we were talking about how we love deep connections and that while we may not be the social butterfly of the group, we love people that we like.

Angie Robertson: 00:30:34

You can never overshare with us.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:36

Like, we want all the over sharing.

Jessica Borman: 00:30:38

Like, that makes, that helps us to feel more connected to someone, and that's what we crave is that deeper connection, that authenticity of someone.

: 00:30:46

You know, I thought whenever I'm in a large group of extroverted people, I find myself feeling exhausted when I leave, but I love going.

: 00:30:56

And that's another thing that I'm really passionate about, too, is, you know, for a lot of years, um, I think I sunk in.

: 00:31:04

I kind of pulled into my introversion and used that as a shield to kind of avoid some of my grief as well, just because it was just kind of like isolation, really.

: 00:31:20

You know, just used it as a way to isolate, you know, I don't go because I just, I can't, you know, I'm just, I don't like those kind of things or I don't like to go to big crowds or just whatever.

: 00:31:30

And so over the years, I have really try to be tried to isolate, tried to isolate myself less and try to get myself out there and do more and try to be around people because I think that's, you need that connection, you know?

Jessica Borman: 00:31:45

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:45

My husband, he's very like, he's like that.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:47

He's like, I love to be social, but then I also have to go and recharge.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:51

Like, it drains me.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:52

Some people, it energizes them and it feeds them.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:55

And then other people, especially introverted people, it'll.

Jessica Borman: 00:31:58

It'll drain us, and then we have to go and get recharged again.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:01

You know, a lot of we were talking earlier about how people have this preconceived idea of journaling, and a lot of people can get hung up on.

Angie Robertson: 00:32:11

And matter of fact, I was talking.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:12

To somebody the other day, and they were like, I hate journaling.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:14

I don't like it.

Angie Robertson: 00:32:16

And I understand.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:18

And I think it goes back to what we were saying, that people think.

Angie Robertson: 00:32:21

That they need to be a good.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:22

Writer or somebody's going to grade them, or there's a specific way that you're supposed to journal, like bullet journaling or whatever.

: 00:32:28

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:32:29

Um, what encouragement would you share with someone that doesn't journal or feels intimidated by it?

Jessica Borman: 00:32:38

What encouragement would you share with them.

: 00:32:41

You know, it's going to be very simple.

: 00:32:42

It's going to be just start.

: 00:32:45

I mean, I would challenge them to give it a try because go to the dollar store, go to Walmart, go to Target, wherever you want to go, and get a notebook or find a notebook around your house and just start with writing ten things that you're grateful for.

: 00:33:10

You know, it just, you don't have to have any fancy pens or any fancy notebooks.

: 00:33:13

Just write ten things I'm grateful for.

: 00:33:16

And then you can Google, or you can buy the journal prompt decks, but you can just, you can Google Journal prompts.

: 00:33:25

You know, whatever you are, you know, struggling with, if you're going through and you're looking at, you know, your gratitude list and there's something that you're like, I see something that's consistently showing up, expand on that.

: 00:33:43

You know, just, just really expand on what you're grateful for.

: 00:33:46

So say, for instance, that you say that you're really appreciate, you really appreciate your marriage, you know, your relationship with your spouse.

: 00:33:57

Maybe Google prompts to appreciate your marriage more and just keeps, keep growing and expanding on the good things.

: 00:34:09

And I think it eventually just radiates throughout your whole entire life whenever you start focusing on some of the, some of the more positive things in your life.

: 00:34:20

So I think that's, that's probably where I would advise somebody to start, is to start with gratitude and then just pinpoint that one thing that's consistently showing up and just focus on that and keep writing about that.

: 00:34:36

Also have a journaling freebie, the journaling 101.

: 00:34:40

So, yes, I'll be sure to link.

Jessica Borman: 00:34:43

To it as well.

: 00:34:44

Yeah.

: 00:34:44

So if anybody's interested in that, it's just, it's really, it gives a little bit of background on, like, what the benefits are and just gives a few tips on how to get started.

: 00:34:55

So anyway, I just want to mention that, too, as a resource for anybody that may be interested in getting started.

: 00:35:01

So.

Angie Robertson: 00:35:02

Sure.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:02

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:03

And we'll definitely, I'll definitely link to that in the show notes as well.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:06

Well, it has been awesome to connect with you and talk all things journaling with a fellow journal lover like me.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:14

So I have loved every second of it.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:16

So thank you, Jessica.

Jessica Borman: 00:35:18

And as we wrap up, I always ask our guest one question, and that is, what does a spirit led life mean for you?

: 00:35:29

You know, I think it's always trusting God's guidance.

: 00:35:35

You know, I try to align everything that I do with what I believe is God's purpose and what, what God is leading me what?

: 00:35:45

The path that he's leading me on.

: 00:35:47

So I just feel like just doing everything with integrity and being kind to everyone that you meet and just trusting God's plan.

: 00:36:01

I've always just leaned into whatever he, I feel like he places in front of me.

Angie Robertson: 00:36:07

And if you want to share with.

Jessica Borman: 00:36:08

The people how they can get in.

Angie Robertson: 00:36:10

Touch with you, that would be great as well.

Jessica Borman: 00:36:11

And plus, I'll link to it in the show notes.

: 00:36:13

Yeah.

: 00:36:14

So you can reach me or you can follow me on Instagram or message me.

: 00:36:18

Jessica Borman is my Instagram handle.

: 00:36:21

And then I'm also on Facebook.

: 00:36:23

I have a Facebook page.

: 00:36:25

I guess if you just search Jessica Borman, it probably would come up.

: 00:36:29

And then you can, you can reach out to me on the website, jessica borman.com.

: 00:36:37

there's a contact me page and I don't know, I would just love for you to listen to my new podcast that I just recently launched last week.

Angie Robertson: 00:36:48

Resilience.

Jessica Borman: 00:36:49

Yeah.

: 00:36:50

With Jessica Borman.

: 00:36:51

So just dm me on Instagram and or email me.

: 00:36:57

Jessica Borman.com.

: 00:36:59

so I just love hearing from people and helping people if they have questions.

: 00:37:04

So just reach out.

: 00:37:06

Love to connect.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:07

Yeah.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:08

And she's great to connect with.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:10

I've experienced it and I subscribe to her newsletter and it's, it's amazing.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:15

Every week I'm, I try to hold myself back because I'm always replying to you on your newsletters.

: 00:37:21

Oh, Angie, I love it.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:23

Some great wisdom in there.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:24

Podcast is amazing.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:25

So congratulations on launching that.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:28

Well, thank you, Jessica, for being here.

Jessica Borman: 00:37:30

It has been awesome.

: 00:37:31

Thank you so much for having me.

: 00:37:33

It's been great.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:35

Isn't Jessica just amazing?

Angie Robertson: 00:37:37

I'll be sure to link to how you can connect with her in the show notes as well as the journaling 101 guide that she mentioned.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:44

And of course, her fabulous journal prompt card decks for this week's heavenly position system challenge.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:52

Take out your journal and find a quiet place if possible.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:55

And I even encourage those who don't currently journal.

Angie Robertson: 00:37:58

I thought we could do something from Jessica's the Joy Deck Journal prompt cards.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:04

And since we talked a little bit about grief at the beginning of the episode, and I'm going to end this episode a little bit about grief, I pulled out a card from the deck, and on the front it says, joy comes, grief goes, we know not how.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:17

And that's a quote from James Russell Lowell.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:20

And on the back, the actual prompt is how has grief affected your life?

Angie Robertson: 00:38:25

Grief of a loved one, loss of a friendship or job or maybe your health.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:31

Grief comes in waves.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:32

How does that grief come in and out of your life?

Angie Robertson: 00:38:37

As I close, I'm going to leave you with an excerpt from Jessica's blog, which you know the drill.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:43

I'll link to it in the show notes.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:45

And I thought this was a great, you know, for continuing this kind of through line of grief.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:50

I thought it was a great way to end.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:52

She writes.

Angie Robertson: 00:38:54

Almost six years after my mom's death and five years after my dad's, my world started to finally crumble.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:00

I finally started to realize that everything wasn't smooth sailing like I believed.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:04

I really wasn't fooling everyone.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:07

Or maybe I was, but not the ones that were closest to me.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:10

I wasn't being the best leader at work.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:12

I wasn't being the best wife.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:14

I wasn't being the best mom.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:16

I wasn't being the best friend.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:18

How did I know?

Angie Robertson: 00:39:19

Because I wasn't being me.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:21

I'd made myself emotionally unavailable to those around me as a protective armor against my true emotions.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:28

If I shut off my feelings, I wouldn't have to face the hurt.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:31

I knew if I faced the hurt, I would appear weak and it would be scary because I'd never felt like that before.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:38

I'm strong, remember?

Angie Robertson: 00:39:39

I'm not a weakling.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:41

I had to finally wave my white flag and surrender.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:44

It got me.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:45

My armor is off and I'm ready to take my lickins to become my best self again.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:50

I have to for myself and for.

Jessica Borman: 00:39:52

Those that I love.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:53

I can't keep hurting others because I'm scared to hurt myself.

Angie Robertson: 00:39:57

I hate roller coasters, but I'm buckled in with my eyes closed.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:01

Here we go.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:02

Let's ride.

Jessica Borman: 00:40:03

And I chose this excerpt because we.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:06

Talked not just about journaling during this episode, but also grief.

Jessica Borman: 00:40:11

I love it also because it reminds.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:14

Me of mark: 1230

Angie Robertson: 00:40:24

The second is equally important.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:26

Love your neighbor as yourself.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:29

No, their commandment is greater than these.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:31

And what stands out to me in those verses is love your neighbor as yourself.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:37

When Jessica wrote, I can't keep hurting others because I'm scared to hurt myself.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:42

This is a beautiful example of loving yourself so we can love others well.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:47

To God be the glory.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:50

Thank you for joining me on today's episode.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:52

This episode was produced, recorded, and edited by me, Angie Robertson.

Angie Robertson: 00:40:58

I look forward to joining you each Thursday for a new episode as we explore together how to have a spirit led life.